Picture this scenario ...
You get into a conversation with a woman on Tinder. She’s pretty cute, you’re back & forth with a bit of banter and things seem alright.
Over the course of a few days, things are heating up & you’re about to drop the gavel & ask her out.
But before you can, she falls off the planet.
So you spend the next however long analyzing in your head what you did wrong, “it all seemed like it was going so well!”, you whine into your Friday afternoon pint ... almost ready to give up and become a monk, so you never have to look at women again.
(Hint: You took too long dude.)
How Long Is A Piece Of String?
Now, this is one thing about the work I do … some of my answers to your questions are ‘how long is a piece of string?’ and others are more ‘nope, mate, it is the way it is and you can’t change it with ANY kind of sorcery ‘m afraid’.
Humans aren’t black & white – we’re moody, sniveling, sniping, seductive, unpredictable cretins in this melting pot called life.
Add Estrogen to the mix & you’re fucked!
So anyhoo, staying on topic Ains ...
‘Piece of string’ answers come from questions like, ‘Will she like me more if I wear this blue shirt’ or ‘Do you think she’s thinking about me right now Ains?’ or ‘What would my sentence be if I ran naked through a police station?’.
More definite answers come from questions like, ‘Are you following or pursuing?’
Sounds the same – have the same definition ... but think about your perception of those 2 words;
Move or travel behind.
"she went back into the house, and Ben followed her" (don’t do that Ben)
Come after or chase (someone or something).
"the officer pursued the van"
Who has more power in these examples?
(don’t say the robbers in the van – smartarse)
Which one’s passive & which one’s active?
Because ultimately, your approach dictates your results … and it ALL starts in your head. Your subconscious mind is like The Wizard Of Oz; He acts all Great & Powerful … but is actually a little old man peddling some shitty chair with fancy smoke.
When you listen to him too much, he’ll tell you to let the woman lead. To wait for her cues before you decide to make your move.
I’m Sorry But Pull Your Socks Up Ben!
This is full blown girl energy … and you don’t have to let your sister put makeup on your face like that traumatizing time when you were 7.
When you pursue, you’re in your masculine power (girls love this – even me – it’s sexy asf).
This comes from a place of full blown intention baby! (and it’s what makes girls throw underwear at ugly crooners from the 1970’s)
Intention is getting on Tinder (or whatever), sitting up straight, broadening your shoulders and deciding that you’ll get a date booked in this Tinder swiping sesh.
Come hella high water!
It’s having that decision so firmly planted in your mind, that your actions will align themselves to that mindset and guess what happens;
You’ll get your date.
This is active living my friend. This is the place you go when you leave your bonghead mates back in the share house to bathe in the sunlight of your new, intentional life.
The coasting and moaning dies down … and the results with women dial up.
And all it takes is ONE decision to do that.
Like now. Right now.
So get to it.
And you too Ben.
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